Thursday, March 12, 2009

Dear Big Dirty Van,

Let me tell you how it all began. You came into my life on one warm fall evening in Provo. I anxiously awaited a call from a cute guy named Bryan, waited for him to pick me up for our first date. And the guy of my dreams showed up... in an old blue minivan. "No matter," I thought, "it shows a lot of character to be a single guy and driving an old minivan - right?" And it did.

You trustily hauled him from Logan to Provo for an entire year, while we dated. Then we married. And you drove us to our honeymoon. Nevermind that we had to pull over several times up Little Cottonwood Canyon and give you a breather so we could make it. We loved you, because you were free and we were poor.

Years went by. Children came. They labeled you "big and dirty". You slowed down. Literally. You decided you did not want to go over 35 mph. That was ok - you still served a purpose, driving me to and from the bus stop for many years. Then I quit my job and Bryan took you over. Lovingly guessing when you needed gas (the gas gauge did not work) and taping red tape over your taillights which had long been busted. Listening only to one of the 2 or 3 stations you decided we could listen to. Hoping the seat belt would 'click' - because sometimes it wouldn't. We took you to the Trax station for Bryan to drive the 1 mile to and from work.

Then today Bryan showed up to the trax station, after his 1 1/2 hour commute. You were not there. We don't know where you are, and we are a little sad you were stolen. But we do have a small amount of satisfaction knowing that whoever took you, for whatever reason.... they aren't going anywhere very fast. In fact, I hope they took you on the freeway. I hope they tried to get you to go over 35 mph. And they will have learned that if you go above 40....the van...just....might... threaten to blow up.

15 comments:

Jessie said...

I'm shedding a tear today for my van's best buddy.

I sure hope they did push it to it's limits and got what they deserved.

AkuTyger said...

Oh no, the big dirty van?

Shark said...

I really feel sad about the big dirty van, it was our first new car. I'm going to miss it.

Elle said...

I am laughing a crying at the same time. I remember when we got the big dirty van, but it was not dirty, it was beautiful. I remember going to the halloween dance in it in High School, and everyone commenting on how my parents had a nice car, and they were serious. And I don't hope that someone tried to push the poor van's limits. I hope the van died peacefully in its sleep, and I'm sure all of it's major organs were taken out of it to save other cars that are later going to be sold.

jodi said...

are the kids taking the news okay?

Bowen Family said...

I'm laughing so hard!!! What a great story - and great memories! Long live the old, beat-up, clunkers and their drivers that we fall in love with! Jon's "roller skate" will always live in our memories! We were able to sell it for $1.00 when we were done with it.

sixmoores said...

Have they ever found the van?

HooverBirds said...

i hope they got stranded on the freeway

Lili said...

Oh no! I'm laughing and feeling bad at the same time-it that normal? We are still using the Subaru that John had when we were dating...the one Jill and Randy used to have....240,000 miles and counting!

Katie said...

That's hilarious! What a way for the van to go--unless, like a lost puppy it finds it's way back to you.

smodi said...

That is so sweet! ROFL

Vanessa said...

Who would do such a thing!? Poor old van away from it's family!

Kelsi said...

I am laughing my head off. That was a great story... and sad.

katie said...

oh no! but also, aside from the obvious sadness of the situation, it is pretty awesome. maybe the thieves will learn their lesson when it goes up in flames. . . or maybe it will work out so poorly for them that you'll find it back at the station in a couple days. . .

(and i'm totally making the spinach shake this week- thanks!)

cathy said...

my kids loved the van more than your other two cars. it was always a treat to go to the park in the van!